Yes, friends it's my sad duty to report on a housing shortage........in the animal kingdom:
Right now, 30 percent of all hermit crabs on our shorelines are living in shells that are too small for them. In the springtime, when the animal has its growth spurt, this shortage skyrockets to 60 percent.
Just how bad is the problem, you ask?
The present lack of housing is so severe that biologists now routinely find land hermit crabs attempting to shelter themselves in glass jars and whatever other ill-fitting forms of refuse they may find at their immediate disposal.
In Jars! In Jars I tell you! How can we not care? You do know all about these creatures endearing nature, right?
Hermit crabs are scavengers and often locate these borrowed dwellings by smell, when the original gastropod inhabitant dies and begins to decay.
It makes my heart go pitter patter it does. But, wait, there's more!
Once a hermit crab adopts a shell, it will keep it until the shell is outgrown, carrying it continuously as a shield, wherever it goes. This is no easy feat, considering that a properly fitting shell must be larger than the hermit crab that wears it, and will often significantly outweigh the crab itself. In order to carry its home, one of the crab's front claws is completely dedicated to clutching the shell. This claw bends backward and holds on to the spool of calcium carbonate at the shell's center. In order to move, the animal must first use this claw to lift the shell and heave it onto its back. In spite of such difficulties, the drive to remain housed is so strong in this species that a typical hermit crab would rather be torn limb from limb than be pulled out of its shell.
Poor, poor babies! It's such a hard life. Quick! How can we help?
Based on what we know about the new needs of these animals in their current environment, the Hand Up Project proposes to manufacture alternative forms of housing, specifically designed for use by land hermit crabs, out of plastic.
But, where's the guilt? Surely we have to have guilt, right?
We acknowledge that such trans-species caregiving may in fact be a form of control. In recognition of this paradox, the new structures are aesthetically based on the architecture of Giuseppe Terragni, an Italian Fascist active in the 1930s.
Well, as long as we're following the Fascists, I feel so much better. Now that I've done my duty, displaying caring and empathy, who are we going to get to pay for it? (Not me, of course.)
The scope of the project is global, and accordingly, corporate funding has been targeted as a potential revenue source.
A great idea! We're going to get those rich companies to pay for it. Yeah! But, wait........
The project is currently soliciting corporate and commercial sponsorship to fund manufacturing and distribution costs by licensing the houses for advertising. In exchange for financial support, each plastic shelter may be readily produced bearing a corporate logo
Logos? We're going to go trans-species with corporate logos? Is this really necessary?
While we recognize that this funding solution will increase the current proliferation of corporate logos on beaches and in other apparently pristine environments, we do feel that it is appropriate to utilize these insignias of global capital, and the wealth they symbolize, in the service of ameliorating environmental problems that have been caused by humans in the first place.
Well, as long as you put it like that, I guess.
The intended audience of the Hand Up Project is someone who, while walking on a beach, might pause to contemplate a slowly ambulating hermit crab, wearing on its back a tiny, man-made plastic house bearing a corporate logo.
I'll keep my eyes open and my contemplation at the ready during my next beach walk, because frankly, it would make me laugh to see a hermit crab sporting a Nike symbol, never mind the fact that it would make a great blog picture. (On the other hand, I always think that the manufacturer should pay me to wear their clothes if their conspicuous logo results in free advertising. Maybe we could set up a profit center for these crabs. Yeah! Give them the resources to buy their own housing.)
Read the whole thing here.
Comments